Mindful Christmas Part 2

Missed yesterday’s article? Catch it here. 

1. Treasure presence rather than presents

Do you find yourself pressured by advertising, family members, friends or your own guilty conscience into lavish spending on gifts that you can ill afford and that may not be met with the genuine joy and gratitude you desired?  Here are some alternative, mindful ways of dealing with gifts:

• Before buying any gifts for friends, family and colleagues, openly discuss budgets (and stick to them!) and agree whether to exchange gifts at all.  Communicating clearly avoids disappointment, resentment and misunderstandings.
  • Consider getting creative and making something with love for someone you love: jam, art or simply a handmade card containing thoughtful words.
  • Unwrapping a few inexpensive but thoughtful gifts can bring just as much pleasure as expensive items of jewellery, technology or designer clothing. Studies have proved the truism ‘stuff doesn’t make you happy’ – after the initial spike of gift-induced excitement, our levels of happiness always revert to their default levels soon afterwards.
  • Buy less, play more.  Family games create beautiful memories and don’t have to cost a penny.  My family enjoy wink murder every Boxing Day!
  • If you do have money to spend, concentrate on experiences rather than material items. This year, my children will have just two small presents to unwrap each;the rest is envelopes containing various fun activities, shows etc to lookforward to attending as a family throughout 2019.
  • Alternatively, provide children with just four gifts: ‘something you want, something you need, something to wear and something to read.’
  • Finally, expect nothing from others.  ‘Expectation is the mother of disappointment.’

• Be grateful

What is Christmas really about for you? Take time to reflect upon and be thankful for the precious gifts you already have in your life.  Think of ten things that you are grateful for and count them on your fingers.

• Make your own traditions

Every culture has its own traditions, which may be passed down through family generations, directed by faith, driven by the media or our desire to fit in with the ‘normal’ society around us.  Why not be flexible and creative – designing your own Christmas traditions as a family?  For example: the Christmas Dinner:

• Do you really enjoy slaving over a hot stove for hours to prepare an enormous, traditional Christmas Dinner?  Do you actually enjoy eating sprouts and the dry flesh of an artificially-fattened large bird?  Maybe try something different this year –encourage the whole family to jointly cook a simple, ethical, healthy and delicious meal, leaving more time to spend with those you love…and less washing up!
  • Try volunteering in a homeless shelter or helping to provide a festive Christmas for those that would otherwise be alone on Christmas Day.
  • If you have experienced a traumatic period due to bereavement, divorce or other losses, be gentle with yourself and don’t feel pressurised into ‘carrying on as normal.’ A change of scene may help ease the pain – maybe book a break in the sunshine or, if you feel like spending some time alone, plan a retreat and discover that peaceful solitude can be a gift.

• Enjoy a mindful walk

It’s easy to sit sleepily in front of the telly box supping eggnog as the Yuletide season rolls on.  Instead, try going for a daily mindful walk and take notice of everything around you: the sights,colours, sounds, smells, the coldness of the air on your face.  A bracing walk around the Saddleworth villages and surrounding countryside can raise spirits, calm tempers, connect us to ourselves, one another and also the beauty of nature that surrounds us.

• Do something for you

Within each of us there is an inner child; our inner child wants love, acceptance,fulfilment and a sprinkling of magic. Why not provide those gifts to yourself – not just at Christmas but every day?  Nurture your well being with small, regular acts of self-care: a relaxing bath or massage, a daily meditation, some exercise and fun.

Calm Connections hope all Saddleworth Life readers are able to enjoy celebrating Christmas with those you treasure… with love, peace, mindful balance, kindness and compassion.

Calm Connections work with the whole family,offering a range of support to strengthen relationships and well being, building connection through communication skills, mindfulness, compassionate understanding and other holistic techniques.  We can help reduce stress and anxiety, offering tools to build confidence, resilience and manage all aspects of life in a calmer, more harmonious and positive way.  Please contact us for details of our one-to-one family support services and upcoming family workshops.

Facebook:     @calmconnectionscic

Website:       calmconnections.org

Email:           info@calmconnections.org

Author: Jude Gidney - Editor

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